Macaulay Culkin Answers The Web's Most Searched Questions

Hi, I'm Macaulay Culkin

and this is the Wired Autocomplete interview.

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Who was Macaulay Culkin, exactly?

[light music]

Alrighty.

Who is Macaulay Culkin named after?

I'm named after I, think Lord Thomas Babington McCauley.

He's buried at Westminster Abby.

I brought my brother there and I just started dancing.

He was like, What are you doing?

And I said, Look down.

And I was dancing on McCauley's grave.

It was kind of a thing I did with my namesake.

I'm McCauley Carson Culkin,

but actually, but that was the way I was born.

My full name is Macaulay Macaulay Culkin Culkin.

Because if anyone asks me,

excuse me, are you Macaulay Culkin?

I can say Macaulay Culkin is my middle name.

Check my Wiki.

Who is Macaulay Culkin going to play in, Fallout?

I wish I could tell you, but I'd have to kill you.

What I can tell you is that it has something to do

with, Fallout: New Vegas.

No, he's an important part of who the Ghoul

and Lucy run into in Vegas in the Wastelands.

Non-spoiler, it has something to do with Kaiser's Legion.

That's right.

I pronounced it just right.

Okay, who was Macaulay Culkin in, The Nutcracker?

I was the prince.

I was the prince of, The Nutcracker.

In the first actor or whatever,

I'm the prince and then I become the Nutcracker,

which is my nickname for Brenda at home.

Just kidding, I don't call her that.

I have much, much worse nicknames.

So yeah, I was in, The Nutcracker.

I used to dance ballet, acting just was coming hard and fast

and it paid more, which is a good thing

because if I stuck with ballet dancing,

I'd be a bitter ex-dancer,

probably opening up a ballet shop

in you know, some strip mall in New Jersey

or something, in desperate need

of hip replacement surgery, you know?

Who was Macaulay Culkin's stunt double in, Home Alone?

His name was Larry, it was Larry.

He was a little person.

He was much older than me.

And yeah, I just remember I was doing my wardrobe fitting

in the wardrobe department and I turned the corner

and there's just this guy and he's dressed exactly like me.

I'm like, Oh, hey, hi.

And like, he's like, Hey, I'm Larry.

I'm like, Oh hello

Like, gee whiz, you're dressed just like me.

He goes, Yeah, I'm a stunt double.

Because there's not a lot of like, stunt kids in this world.

I think that's because of insurance.

Holy shh.

All right, can Macaulay Culkin sing?

I can karaoke under the table kind of thing.

I don't think you'd be seeing me playing Freddie Mercury

anytime soon.

I like to sing in the shower and so forth.

Would you like me to do, Take On Me by A-ha

right now in front of you?

Because that's not gonna happen

'cause everyone forgets the high note

and it always messes them up during karaoke.

Can Macaulay Culkin Drive?

I've never had a driver's license before in my entire life.

I'm 45 years old.

I originally chalked it up to me being a New Yorker,

and that's kind of what New Yorkers do and so forth.

But I haven't lived in New York in a long time.

Brenda and I, we had this agreement.

We don't make New Year's resolutions ever.

And we made a New Year's resolution.

I was gonna get my driver's license

and she was gonna hire a wedding planner.

We're not married.

And yeah, I still don't drive, so.

When did Macaulay Culkin host, SNL?

Oh, I hosted it in '91.

You know who my musical guest was?

David Bowie.

Yeah, that's right, that's how old I am.

I kind of did it in a pretty cool year.

You still had like, the Dana Carvey's

and the Phil Hartman's, that era.

But you had like, Mike Meyers and Chris Rock and Spade

and Sandler and all that kind of stuff.

So it was a nice, it was a nice kind of bridging the gap

kind of thing.

My father, who was insane,

he made me do the whole show without cue cards.

So I had to memorize the entire show.

And the crazy part is, is that like,

even when you do the rehearsals

and stuff like that, there's still sketches

that they don't make it to the live show.

Yeah, I had to memorize those too.

Needless to say, he made a lot of fans

with the rest of the cast there

'cause they had to memorize their lines too.

[Speaker] Do you know what his reasoning was?

My father's reasoning was, is that he hated

when he could see somebody reading their

cue cards like that.

And so he didn't want me doing that.

To each their own, I guess.

And by their own, I mean his own.

Macaulay Culkin, tattoos?

Yeah, I do have a tattoo.

I have a matching tattoo with my goddaughter.

It's a little spoon on my right arm over here.

I steal spoons, it's a kind of a thing.

She already was tatted up, she still is.

She's a model, starting to go to like, fancy parties

and stuff like that.

And I like, one of the advice I said to her,

don't ruin anything, right?

You know, when you steal a spoon,

it doesn't really ruin anything.

Don't forget to take something with you.

Like, you know, when you go to these fancy parties

or whatever, take something with you

and don't forget to put it up your sleeve.

So we have matching tattoos up our sleeve

of these spoons.

My kids really love it because they still believe in magic

and they're young enough, like palm a spoon and go,

Ugh, and I pull spoons out of my tattoo.

So they think it's a magic tattoo.

[speaker shouts]

Oh geez.

All right, does Macaulay Culkin die in, My Girl?

Gosh, spoiler alert, geez.

For a 34-year-old movie.

Yeah, I died by bee sting also.

And I know that I make it sound really sweet like,

oh, I got stung by a bee.

Like, no, no, it was like a whole hive.

They actually released a bunch of bees on me.

That's not a joke.

I got the part and the only way they it would go through is

that I did a go to an allergist

and get like poke tests.

Day coms, all that stuff.

They put the stuff on my

fingers that smell like the queen bee.

They're like, Oh, they're gonna be

attracted to your fingers.

So they were like, Just wave from 'em

in front of your face.

They released like, thousands of bees onto me,

that wanted to have sex with my fingertips.

And I was a whole, you know,

just an innocent 10-year-old.

That shit would not fly now.

I'm telling you, fly, get it?

'Cause bees fly.

It's actually one of those things,

the bee handler warned me.

He goes, Guess what?

Bees fly slower than people run.

And I said, Does that count for 10-year-old children?

Does Macaulay Culkin like wrestling?

Yeah, I love wrestling, you kidding me?

I'm a lifelong wrestling fan.

I'm actually a well known wrestling fan too.

And recently I went to a, one of the early RAWs

when they moved over to Netflix,

I got a big pop from the crowd.

They showed me in the audience, woo, yay.

And then I was going out to the, a RAW couple of weeks later

and I was on the plane with a CM Punk.

I was like, Hey Phil, hey, what's going on?

I said, I'm going to RAW tomorrow.

I said, Good luck in there.

He is like, Oh, thanks, thanks.

Oh, he goes, Just wanna let you know that me

and the boys in the back, we thought it was really funny

that you got a bigger pop than Roman Reigns

from the audience.

Did Macaulay Culkin buy the, Home Alone, house?

No, I did not buy the, Home Alone, house.

I mean, it would've been funny if I did.

Actually, you know what would be funnier,

if I bought the house next door to it

and then was just mowing my lawn every day.

Oh, you know, just like with a cigar in my mouth,

kind just like, you know, tummy hanging out,

and all this others stuff.

Oh man, I've heard things, stories about that house.

Oh, I'd avoid that.

Man, it's been broken into so many times.

Oh, I tell you what.

You know, so I did not buy the Home Alone house.

Although there was an opportunity there

to turn it into some kind of Airbnb experience,

including me.

I decided to kind of steer away from the,

owning the, Home Alone house vibe, I guess.

But also, you know, let me know

if you're interested in investing.

Is Macaulay Culkin a nice guy?

Yeah, I mean, aren't I pleasant right now?

Tell me I'm pleasant.

Yeah, no, I feel like I'm a nice enough guy, you know?

Yeah, I try to be courteous

and professional when it comes

to the work environment and stuff.

And my kids like me.

So, you know, there's that, you know,

I go over really well with the 3

and 4-year-old crowd, that's for sure.

Is Macaulay Culkin a gamer?

I used to be.

I don't really have a lot of time for games so much anymore.

Probably the last new game off the shelf

that I actually played from, from pillar to post

was Mass Effect 3.

So, you know, I'm already kind of like,

that's like a decade ago.

Don't get me wrong, I still circle around, you know,

I still do some of the Mario Karts.

Me and the lady will lay in bed doing the Mario Kart thing

every once in a while.

You know, it's very sexy.

I'm Tanooki Mario and she's like, Peach.

You know, like, yeah, that's just the game though.

Is Macaulay Culkin friends with Joe Pesci?

I mean, I'm friendly with Joe Pesci.

I'm not even sure if he has a cell phone,

to be honest with you.

He actually golfs with one of my neighbors who lives

around the corner and I keep on saying,

Oh, you should tell him to just ring my doorbell.

Honestly, that'd be fricking amazing.

All of a sudden, just like I look at my little door bird

or something like that, it's like, Hey, it's Joe.

You know, it's like, Oh gosh, you can come on in.

I'd have my kids set up traps for him and stuff.

You know, he's 82 years old.

I'm sure that'd go over very well with him.

I have nothing but kind of things to say about him.

He's a nice guy.

McCauley Culkin.

[speaker chuckles]

Macaulay Culkin, Home Alone, tour.

Oh yeah, I'm doing a tour.

I'm going around to a couple cities.

We show the movie and you get to watch it

with other like-minded people

who actually also like the movie.

It's one thing to watch it in your living room

and just laugh at those jokes.

It's another to be in a theater full of people

that are also laughing at the same jokes.

I do kind of a fireside chat/Q & A afterward,

which is a lot of fun.

Tell you some factoids about the movie and everything.

Sometimes I'll pull your kids up on stage

and ask them trivia questions,

really bad trivia questions with really even worse prizes.

But that are on brand.

If I'm coming through your town,

you should come see it.

35 year anniversary, so there you go.

McCulley Culkin Halloween.

Yeah, we love Halloween in our house.

Last year I went as Joe Burrow, the quarterback

of the Cincinnati Bengals

'cause everyone says that he looks like me

'cause I don't look like him.

This year, I asked my oldest.

I asked him what he wants to be.

He goes, I wanna be Batman.

I'm like, All right, cool, and what do you want mom to be?

Robin.,

And I'm like, Okay, what do you want me to be?

He goes, A toilet.

Swear to God, he asked me to be a toilet.

So I, yeah, I dressed as a toilet.

The best dang toilet outfit I could put together,

with a plunger hat and everything.

I have an idea for next year, but that's for next year.

Macaulay Culkin.

John Candy, I don't eat candy on the toilet, no.

Oh no, never mind, John Candy.

Yeah, the actor.

Yes, I worked with him, I did three films with him actually.

And also I was just in that documentary, I Like Me.

It was a wonderful love letter to him

and I think it really did him justice.

It's a nicer way to go out than, Wagon's East.

The producers and everyone, they wanted

to consider it his last movie, which I think is kind of apt.

I think it really did, you know, again,

it really painted a really touching story of him.

Macaulay Culkin, Zootopia 2?

Yeah, me and my lady Brenda, we're in, Zootopia 2.

We take a bite of that forbidden fruit.

We play brother and sister.

[speaker meows]

I mean, doing the meow thing

'cause actually, we play cats in the movie.

Usually when you do animated stuff,

you record in separate booths

and they kind of just jumble it all together later.

This time, they actually had us like, in the booth

at the same time, just kind of goofing off and stuff.

I love doing stuff I can show my kids.

And so they love the, Zootopia, franchise

and they do not recognize our voices whatsoever

because they're children of a certain age.

They just, you know, they don't like these bad cats.

I'm like, Yeah, someday you're gonna love these bad cats.

Yeah, ah.

What was Macaulay Culkin?

That's what my mother's been asking for years.

What was Macaulay Culkin?

What was Macaulay Culkin's first role?

Well, not counting some studio theater

I did in New York, if you're asking more

for my first film role,

it was in a movie called, Rocket Gibraltar.

It was Burt Lancaster, it's one of his last films.

Had a bunch of New York theater actors like Bill Pullman,

Patricia Clarkson, stuff like that.

I just remember they thought it was really cute

that like, Oh, there's this, like, I think I was six,

I was six years old and like, I was sitting down on a little

like, director's chair next to Burt Lancaster, who's like,

you know, 80 something.

And then, you know, he thinks it's funny.

He turns to me and he goes, Hey kid,

do you have any advice for me?

I'm like, he, he, he, he, I go, Yeah,

don't step on my lines.

And he was like, All right.

This kid's a goer.

This kid's good, this kid's going somewhere.

What color are Macaulay Culkins...

Oh, I thought it was gonna be about bowel movements.

Okay, what color is Macaulay Culkin's eyes?

They're mostly blue, it depends on what I'm wearing.

Sometimes they turn a little gray,

sometimes they turn a little green.

But yeah, I got blue eyes, you know, yeah, so.

What band was Macaulay Culkin in?

I was in a band called the Pizza Underground,

which is exactly what you think it is.

It's a velvet underground cover band.

But except we change all the lyrics to be about pizza.

So it's like, instead of waiting for the man,

it'd be waiting for the delivery man.

Instead of, I'll Be Your Mirror, it's

♪ I'm Little Caesar ♪

You know, things like that.

It was one of those bands that was quite relentless.

We would rhyme mushrooms with mushrooms.

Before every show, I'd go,

Hey, you guys ready for some pizza songs?

And the crowd would go, Yeah.

Great 'cause the hamburger shows across the street.

We played Seattle a number of times.

We played all over the place, but we played Seattle

and about the fifth time we played there, I said,

Hey, how many people here were at our last show?

And the like, 90% of the audience went, Yeah.

And I go, okay, get ready for the exact same thing.

1, 2, 3, 4.

I mean, we hit our ceiling pretty much.

I mean it was a gig that had a shelf life,

but it was a ton of fun.

Got to play pretend band for a while.

Dems all them boards.

Not surprised you guys are asking a lot of those questions.

I mean, it's funny 'cause I don't know

what questions you're gonna ask 'cause I already have all

the answers, except for the poop thing.

I don't normally Google myself.

So it's interesting to see

what you guys are fishing around for.

Yeah, it was good times.

I'm gonna get to keep those boards too though.

I'm taking those home with me.

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